i called her ‘siSTAR’

MARKING ON THOUGHTS OVER 03/01/2018

Introducing an important figure in my life!

When I was almost getting myself into the pit of hell, I had my maternal cousin whom constantly gave the motivation I needed to build myself up and to bounce back to the rival of life. I honestly never knew that she was a different person from what I have shaped her up against my head(i’m definitely an individual who fail to realise what a failure it could get to be quick to judge)>>my FLAW!. Obviously, I always thought she is one of the cousins I wouldn’t build a close connection with as we had our differences, as we were off different age group, different lifestyle as she was residing abroad and there were very limited conversations we shared as we only met at occasional events (even that was rare).

So it all started on 07/01/2016 back then, I was robbed while I was getting home and I lost all my important belongings like wallet, cash, bank cards and etc. I was deprived since I had to pay my rental for my stay here in Moscow, and I cant reach my parents again as they earn so little to send me and to be able to send the amount once again is definitely a NO. I felt like I had no one to reach for help, and decided to just open up to this beautiful soul I call sister, yes she was the one KrishnaVeni Ganeson Pillai ! It was a shame I didn’t have her contact number and wrote her on facebook messenger. she replied me right away and listen to my rant of being misfortune on the road and to have lost everything and walk without a penny. She asked me “how can I help you, dear”? yes, without hesitation she offered me to pay my rental for the month. I felt so content and that very moment I realised the ones whom constantly be around your circle doesn’t mean that they are gonna lift you up when you approach a fall, and those who are far away by sight doesn’t mean will never make a person less than to be loved as close! She proved me that fewer conversations were not a reason to not help me and feel the love! when many closes individuals knew the situation and didn’t even call me to ask on my wellbeings, sister Veni proved me otherwise. Not only by offering money aid, she offered me the best words for soothing my heartbreak..she kept asking me if I’m hurt during the robbery and if I’m safe. I broke into tears cause I felt so much of loss words to describe her care and my failure to realise humanity. This incident was an eye-opener for me to realise who was a true companion at hard times.

and guys! it didn’t end there! well, life has been a lot of misery ever since I took a leap on pursuing my mum’s ambition! being in the medical school its all about having the money even if you don’t have a brain….yeah how sad life is in here!  the world is crazy! education has become a business trade ! #sadtruth

Then came this day, where I was on shatter and almost giving the only dream of my family…especially my mum’s! the day I was banned from examination due to delay in fee payment at the medical school I’m currently in! I was a third-year student pursuing at Moscow State Medical University at that point, it was on the 30th Jan 2017, I couldn’t pay up my fees! I couldn’t sit for one of the most difficult examination, which cost me fortnights of burning the midnight lamp! I went to the hall all neat and confident and little failure on keeping my bright round Indian eyes as alive because I was certainly sleep deprived (panda eyes basically)! As I walk to submit my recognition card and report book, my head of department Mrs Budanova (the best teacher) laid her hands on my shoulder and said, girl, you got to call up the deans office cause your name is removed and banned from examination. It was the first time I am facing such a heartache. I walked out and my best friend wendy chien came out after completing her examination and asked me what happened… I fell on my knees with the obvious downpour of tears, (almost flooded the hallway) and made wendy tear for me as well… it was so heart wrenching to not be able to sit for an examination…the struggle is real guys, ain’t easy to digest a shock like that! I called my mum, and literally cried for good 10 seconds before even throwing the stone that would definitely lay my mum ground sad. she would definitely find it so hard to breathe after knowing I couldn’t sit for the exam only because I couldn’t pay up my fees in time. amma (mum) cried the moment I told her and she felt so bad.. I told her not to worry with a  braved voice and say let’s move on and leave it to god. if I’m destined to stay here and complete my course god will make a way ma. i hung up the call and headed back to my room with multiple emotions running down my veins and the beats of my abnormal heart(yes I was born with malformed valves) and constantly deal with palpitations and murmurs .. i have been elongated valves since birth and its not the deal here… for almost a week amma couldn’t come up with the balance of my fee but she came up with the 70% of payment i owe the university. once again I reached sister veni (with the concern of my mum, though mum hesitated ,i had no options)and asked if she could help me as the rest of the individuals my mum reached had their excuses stacked like it was surreal and to reality, it was bullshitting! nevertheless, certain humans are just inconsiderate and ungrateful ..(i realise as i grow)… again without having any time for second thought and room to doubts, sister veni offered to make the rest of the payment to the university.. it brought my mum a big relieve and a bunch of thanks to sis veni. I obviously felt like a dream that i haven’t woke up myself from…cause I only met “the ungrateful receivers” more than “the kind givers”… sis Veni , has always been the modest in speech and the kindest in actions…she just doesn’t preach (never saw or heard even once) but she does it all in actions….I’m sure if she is constantly helping me, she must be a limelight in many other individuals..

so guys from this narration, I’m sure many understood the phrase (don’t judge a book by its cover, don’t judge a latte by its mug )

someday i wish to grow up as modest as sis Veni even if i cant reach her heights of modesty..at least ill try (life goals).

to the patient readers, I hope the qualities of sis veni will enlighten many of you guys to reach out when your help is needed..make existence with no noise but action.. best wishes

MARKING ONE RESOLUTION OF 2018 TO BE LIKE “SIS VENI”

I LOVE YOU SIStar ..you are my shining amour !

a sweet picture of sis veni and my mum ❤

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