Serving my soul to journalling a blog .. Writing hasn’t been a new agenda in my life as I have always shared equal interest to making read items into reviews…why I chose blogging despite having a tumblr account is because using tumblr I kinda repost most stuffs …and I delicately want to have my own write ups to be published without any repost…
Wanted to keep this blog more personalised and post only things I do and experience. It could be travel, food or even lifestyle ..
Happy reading folks…i hope I bring more sense up here !
I am not much a fan of the winter but what I adore is how magical it is to witness the snowfall. when the snowflakes on the coat seem like a broad smile and how fragile a creation of God is. Living in Moscow for the past five years has grown me fonder towards the variation of 4 seasons. Been brought up in the south-east, I have only experience sunshine and rain falls.
Being grumpy on winter is only gonna put me at loss to the creation of god. I have realised today while I was sipping on my cup of tea by the window how lucky am I to wake up to snowfall and to see my toes and fingers glow in red. It adds colours to life!
ways to appreciate winter:
*pick a new winter sport; ski, snowboarding, ice skating
*visit more indoor cafes and museums as it may keep you warm and more adventurous
*conduct home parties and events, invite friends and family_ perhaps a good time to catch up
*start on a new novel and write the summary, and eventually you are hooked on journalling as I am
*do some gardening, YES! discover them the winter plants. get to know if you have green fingers yet then.
*plan a mid-winter trip to travel with buddies, breathe a new air is always a bliss
*more reason to cuddles, winter love ❤
So yeah winter isn’t as bad after all if you look at it in a more positive view…
When I was almost getting myself into the pit of hell, I had my maternal cousin whom constantly gave the motivation I needed to build myself up and to bounce back to the rival of life. I honestly never knew that she was a different person from what I have shaped her up against my head(i’m definitely an individual who fail to realise what a failure it could get to be quick to judge)>>my FLAW!. Obviously, I always thought she is one of the cousins I wouldn’t build a close connection with as we had our differences, as we were off different age group, different lifestyle as she was residing abroad and there were very limited conversations we shared as we only met at occasional events (even that was rare).
So it all started on 07/01/2016 back then, I was robbed while I was getting home and I lost all my important belongings like wallet, cash, bank cards and etc. I was deprived since I had to pay my rental for my stay here in Moscow, and I cant reach my parents again as they earn so little to send me and to be able to send the amount once again is definitely a NO. I felt like I had no one to reach for help, and decided to just open up to this beautiful soul I call sister, yes she was the one KrishnaVeni Ganeson Pillai ! It was a shame I didn’t have her contact number and wrote her on facebook messenger. she replied me right away and listen to my rant of being misfortune on the road and to have lost everything and walk without a penny. She asked me “how can I help you, dear”? yes, without hesitation she offered me to pay my rental for the month. I felt so content and that very moment I realised the ones whom constantly be around your circle doesn’t mean that they are gonna lift you up when you approach a fall, and those who are far away by sight doesn’t mean will never make a person less than to be loved as close! She proved me that fewer conversations were not a reason to not help me and feel the love! when many closes individuals knew the situation and didn’t even call me to ask on my wellbeings, sister Veni proved me otherwise. Not only by offering money aid, she offered me the best words for soothing my heartbreak..she kept asking me if I’m hurt during the robbery and if I’m safe. I broke into tears cause I felt so much of loss words to describe her care and my failure to realise humanity. This incident was an eye-opener for me to realise who was a true companion at hard times.
and guys! it didn’t end there! well, life has been a lot of misery ever since I took a leap on pursuing my mum’s ambition! being in the medical school its all about having the money even if you don’t have a brain….yeah how sad life is in here! the world is crazy! education has become a business trade ! #sadtruth
Then came this day, where I was on shatter and almost giving the only dream of my family…especially my mum’s! the day I was banned from examination due to delay in fee payment at the medical school I’m currently in! I was a third-year student pursuing at Moscow State Medical University at that point, it was on the 30th Jan 2017, I couldn’t pay up my fees! I couldn’t sit for one of the most difficult examination, which cost me fortnights of burning the midnight lamp! I went to the hall all neat and confident and little failure on keeping my bright round Indian eyes as alive because I was certainly sleep deprived (panda eyes basically)! As I walk to submit my recognition card and report book, my head of department Mrs Budanova (the best teacher) laid her hands on my shoulder and said, girl, you got to call up the deans office cause your name is removed and banned from examination. It was the first time I am facing such a heartache. I walked out and my best friend wendy chien came out after completing her examination and asked me what happened… I fell on my knees with the obvious downpour of tears, (almost flooded the hallway) and made wendy tear for me as well… it was so heart wrenching to not be able to sit for an examination…the struggle is real guys, ain’t easy to digest a shock like that! I called my mum, and literally cried for good 10 seconds before even throwing the stone that would definitely lay my mum ground sad. she would definitely find it so hard to breathe after knowing I couldn’t sit for the exam only because I couldn’t pay up my fees in time. amma (mum) cried the moment I told her and she felt so bad.. I told her not to worry with a braved voice and say let’s move on and leave it to god. if I’m destined to stay here and complete my course god will make a way ma. i hung up the call and headed back to my room with multiple emotions running down my veins and the beats of my abnormal heart(yes I was born with malformed valves) and constantly deal with palpitations and murmurs .. i have been elongated valves since birth and its not the deal here… for almost a week amma couldn’t come up with the balance of my fee but she came up with the 70% of payment i owe the university. once again I reached sister veni (with the concern of my mum, though mum hesitated ,i had no options)and asked if she could help me as the rest of the individuals my mum reached had their excuses stacked like it was surreal and to reality, it was bullshitting! nevertheless, certain humans are just inconsiderate and ungrateful ..(i realise as i grow)… again without having any time for second thought and room to doubts, sister veni offered to make the rest of the payment to the university.. it brought my mum a big relieve and a bunch of thanks to sis veni. I obviously felt like a dream that i haven’t woke up myself from…cause I only met “the ungrateful receivers” more than “the kind givers”… sis Veni , has always been the modest in speech and the kindest in actions…she just doesn’t preach (never saw or heard even once) but she does it all in actions….I’m sure if she is constantly helping me, she must be a limelight in many other individuals..
so guys from this narration, I’m sure many understood the phrase (don’t judge a book by its cover, don’t judge a latte by its mug )
someday i wish to grow up as modest as sis Veni even if i cant reach her heights of modesty..at least ill try (life goals).
to the patient readers, I hope the qualities of sis veni will enlighten many of you guys to reach out when your help is needed..make existence with no noise but action.. best wishes
MARKING ONE RESOLUTION OF 2018 TO BE LIKE “SIS VENI”
Penning on my new year resolutions these days has made an affirmation that I have only grown stronger by each passing year! 2017 has been more of a wild roller coaster ride as being said I was facing so much on my end especially when I was unfortunate to be back on my summer schedule. I did not stand a chance of meeting my parents and brother, having to lose my pet ‘ cutie ‘ and to add on, I was having much of a dent in the university with my outstanding fee, having my colleague return to her country in the midst of the term for visa issues , and much more petty issues coming up now and then. It was so sore to even breathe when I had to take in each day rising a new issue to deal with. So it didn’t just stay there, I started realising the count of humans I can rely on, the breaking of friendships, the loss of humanity in the elders, and the power abuse by educators.
That’s the dark nights of my crying eyes but I also had the blooming days of my life in 2017. It was a fair share after all. I had a great summer in here, as Moscow was so beautiful in the summer with the company of my friend Keji and the number of strangers I call friends now. I rarely fell sick throughout 2017 and that alone made me strong enough to face all the challenges. I definitely felt more loved each day by my parents and brother and that speaks a lot about how I managed my 2017 without giving up.
Being surrounded by various characters of people, such as the fake ones, the ones with neutralism behaviour, the greedy ones, the pretentious, the opportunistic ones, dudeeeee… I survived these humansssssss!!!!!! merely because I believed every person I met and every scenario I experienced were gods plans. Despite, I had always been blessed with beautiful souls I call friends which are just a number of them who caught me before falling, who pushed me to face the reality, who held me before I gave up, who helped me in every difficult situation, they are the rare ones on definite. They helped without expectations, without any return and always kept me going. Deepan , Mali , Keji , Thivya , Cynthia , Nazirah and Wendy , ill definitely want this names to stay documented as they are those I count on and never left me when I am in despair! thank you alone isn’t enough for this amazing humans i have in my circle ❤
My parents and Rinnesh have been and will always be my greatest support system in life. With all these reasons of people to live, why would I fall back and give up.. that’s a big No! SO I’m eager to start the year with the very much interesting challenges awaiting me, I would say I’m prepared to face it all regardless the bumps and holes. i have got my list of resolutions to be made and shared with you guys but of course, its gonna be on my next write up.. aint’ want this to be lengthy and boring.
Here are some clicks on my new year celebrations all the way from Moscow. It started with a blast and always feel amazed at how important is the firework displays among the nations.
well, yesterday was the day I jumped off my comfort zone and spend hours at an art shop nearby my living. guess what ??I don’t regret the hours spent cause I picked a new hobby now. yes walking around perfect set up of Leonardo Art Shop was amazing. as you see the outlet was named after the greatest painter Leonardo Da Vinci… it speaks a lot about art, architecture and etc.
what can you find there?/// okay, that’s more like what can’t you find in there…they had a large scale of supply on hand works like needles, painting brushes, frames, threads, beads , planks and many more interesting items.
a few captivating pictures from the gallery.
Wonder what a new hobby I picked? Being a student I didn’t want to spend much so I got my self Qulling papers… and I watched a few videos on you tube and started my hands on it…
It was as simple as you wouldn’t imagine. . What can this quilling set purpose you?
Well you can mend ur own customised birthday cards, deco purposes and even borders to your sideboards…
Here are some snaps on my quilzz…
Yeah that’s the beauty of picking a hobby… I loved mine, so why don’t you guys go venture out yours at the nearest art outlet…
tadaaaaa…see!!!! what i have grabbed from the psychology section !!
so upon the title “whatever you think , think opposite” , guys the pinch of fact that i have not really complete reading it, but i gotta tell ya i invested on a good piece.
since life at my end hasnt been a very smooth ride, i needed something to boost me up lately, and thats when i met saras for coffee and we randomly walked into a bookstore in lubyanka street..wonder who is saras??? well you will know her in my upcoming posts, keep a pause there yeah..
lets come to the real deal, allow me to narate a little from what i have read by far. if u guys r looking for a good command of english, this book is exclusive! moreover, not like other psychology books that emphasises the do’s and dont’s in life, this book actually makes you think beyond that fact.
this book are not wordly at mere, but it has beautiful illustartions. its captivating for a reader like me whom easily be ammused with pictures. it builds more interest to actually turn to the next page.
okay,lets move to the most important part, why this book? what about the content? well, this book literally states the benefits of making WRONG decision (shocked????) …yar … this book says that taking wrong decisions actually benefits one, shows how risk is security in your life…and explains that unreason is the best reason to move forward.
i have plucked a several phrases from the book which seemed interesting and easy:
” i wish means: wouldnt it be nice if…..”
if you always make the right decision,
the safe decision, the one most people make.
you will be the same as everyone else.
always wishing life was different.”
“no ONE but NO….”
it is fashionable for so called thinking people try to lose their ego.
well they should think a bit harder.
presumably we were given egos for a reason.
great people have great egos, maybe thats what makee them great.
so let us put it to good use rather than try to deny it.
lifes all about ME anyway.
so guys …look for this book at your nearest bookstore for it may change your perspective on how you look at life and its offerings.. this author whom is known for his collection “ITS NOT HOW GOOD YOU ARE, ITS HOW GOOD YOU WANT TO BE” has proven that good books dont give up all their secrets at once.. i am personally looking forward to many of his collections.